I have seen some major shifts in who I am as a person since entering into college. Although all the changes put together make me who I am, I’m thankful they go much deeper than the change from physical therapy to physician assistant. The first thing that comes to mind is how I have a deeper understanding of what is really important. As a freshman, everything school related was of utmost importance - it was more important than sleep, than making friends and creating relationships, than my family, than continuing things I was passionate about. I operated like this for years, and I am really unsure of how I didn’t burn out sooner. Midway through my first semester of junior year, I really began to understand what was really important. The relationships I had created needed more attention, my family was sacrificing for me and they deserved more of my devotion, the church was willing to be there for me and help me grow and it was demanding my time (demanding in a good way). All of these important pieces had been neglected, and it made my time at school honestly quite miserable. I had no balance. However, when I began putting my priorities in line, while still being a good steward of the educational opportunities that had been given to me, that is when I started to experience the fullness of life. I am not going to look back on this experience and remember that assignment I worked so hard on, but I am going to remember my experiences I had, the people I met, and the life lessons I learned while I was here.
Perhaps the most important change occurred in my faith. I knew I had all these passions before really knowing Christ, but I had no idea what to do with them. When I truly began putting Jesus at the center of my life, all those passions began to make sense. He gave me a heart to help people, and that was why I wanted to go into the medical field. Now it isn’t just me striving for a degree (which is really unsatisfying and unfulfilling for me), but it’s me pursuing Kingdom work to honor Jesus. It is totally okay for me to be a doctor and a missionary, I do not have to choose. I knew I was at Emory to show people Jesus, but I didn’t know how to do that. That’s when I realized that I have a heart for college aged women who feel like they don’t have a place. This is where I was able to put my passions into action by putting time into Women’s Bible Study on campus to begin actually relating with women who felt that way. Jesus has pruned me since my being at college to understand that if He is not at the center of my life, I will never be satisfied. I don’t need a big degree, lots of money, or the reputation of success to be fulfilled, all I have to do is follow Him and carry my cross. At the feet of Jesus is where I find purpose.
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April 2019
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